At breakfast this morning….
Charlie: What’s her problem?
Max: Shorts are in a bunch about the milk puddles that Chloe left behind. She’s going nuts.
Cassie: SHE is right here in the room with you.
Max: Pffft.
Charlie: Pffft.
Cassie: You need to wipe up the milk puddles! Otherwise they get all over the homework and the newspaper.
Charlie: Why should HE have to wipe it up? Chloe’s the one who made the mess.
Max: (nodding his head vigorously) Yea. Chloe made the mess. (Smirks at Charlie, who immediately smirks back.)
Cassie: (mumbling bitterly) Never help out. Have to do everything…Do I need to give another Sponge Tutorial?
Max/Charlie: No!
Charlie: What’s a sponge tutorial?
Max: You don’t want to know. Anyway, as we’ve already established long ago, I don’t do sponges.
Cassie: Pffft. Unbelievable.
Charlie: How come?
Max: They smell. Makes your hands smell bad for like the whole day if you touch one. Total gross.
Charlie: Oh.
Cassie: They do not! I’ve already explained that MY sponges never smell because I wring them out thoroughly and change out the old sponges with new sponges like all the time.
Charlie: “MY” sponges? What, you OWN them or something?
Max: I know, right?! (under his breath) She’s crazy with the sponge thing.
Cassie: Again, talking about me like I’m not here. I can hear you!
(Max gets up to leave, ignoring me completely. He and Charlie exchange a high-five in exaggerated brotherly solidarity.)
Charlie: Have a good day, Bro!
Max: Yep. You too.
Cassie: Pffft. Look, your brother forgot to bring his cereal bowl to the sink. Max!!!! (Then to Charlie) Will you bring his bowl over with yours when you’re done, please?
Charlie: Yep.
Cassie: And could you wipe up that milk spill your sister left behind?
Charlie: No way! I’m not getting the sponge stink thing on my hands.
Cassie: There’s no sponge stink thing.
Charlie: I don’t believe you. (Wipes up the milk drips with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.) There!
Cassie: Charlie, now your sweatshirt is going to smell like sour milk!
Charlie: Oh well! (Leaves the kitchen to go brush his teeth. I can hear him talking to Scott, who’s still in the first floor bathroom, shaving.)
Scott: What’s up? Mom sounds mad.
Charlie: Sponges. She’s all worked up about sponges.
Cassie: (yelling from the kitchen) I am NOT worked up about sponges. I’m worked up that no one in this house ever uses one to clean up their messes.
Scott: I see what ya mean.
Charlie: Careful, Dad. She also has bionic hearing.