Many nonchalant questions by the nine-year-old boy about duct tape eventually became cause for concern.
“How long does the stick on a piece of duct tape last?
Where does Dad keep the duct tape, again?
Would I be allowed to use scissors for just a moment to cut a small piece?”
prompted my own query, “Why do you ask?”
Charlie’s answer: “Because I was planning on taping Genevieve’s mouth shut, but I’d probably get in a lot of trouble when you try to remove that kind of powerful tape from her lips. Because the stick is so strong.”
My response: “Yes. That’s true. Charlie, you know how you’ve been banned from scissors until you go to college? The same holds for duct tape. I absolutely don’t ever want to see you working with duct tape. If I do, you’ll be put in your room for a very, very long time.”
Because he can’t resist having the final word: “Relax. I didn’t even do anything, Mom.”
Then, because he’s learned from the true Last-Word Master: “Your thoughts can be dangerous, my son, so I must take preventative measures with you wherever I see fit.”
Cassie: Little Devil.
Charlie: Annoying parent.
Cassie: Pesky child.
Charlie: Be quiet.
I leave the room and begin my mission to confirm that there are no tantalizing rolls of duct tape anywhere within the Bollinger household.